Had I been standing in a grocery store talking with its owner, and had that owner called me in because he was closing shop and was inquiring as to whether or not I could liquidate his stock, I wouldn’t have been taken aback by the question.
Charred Chattel
Those who have little or no experience in the auction world are usually unaware of the strange and absurd items–some of which look like garbage–that can bring high prices on the block. So our mantra is “don’t throw anything away before we come and look.” That is our golden rule, one we ask all who call us about liquidating an estate to follow, lest they make a tragic mistake and send marketable items to the landfill. However, all good rules have exceptions, even golden ones.
Three-Wheeled Bicycles
Often my states of mind aren’t served up neat. My moods are usually cocktails consisting of curious combos that can be the dangerous and intoxicating intellectual equivalent of Jaeger and Red Bull. Indeed, as I write this very blog post, I find myself feeling both facetious and magnanimous. Hence the following list of heterogeneous statements will seem comically sarcastic to some, while others will view them as small epiphanies. Yes, I offer the following tidbits with the intention of making most of you laugh, but note that they also serve the need to set the record straight with certain misinformed individuals.
Peculiar Piano Placement
So I was watching an episode of Band of Brothers on HBO in which the brave soldiers of Easy Company were storming a town in Normandy. While they were scrambling for cover from Nazi machine gun fire, they ran past an upright piano that happened to be sitting in the middle of the street. No one was playing it, no one was lying dead beside it, and it appeared to be undamaged. Had it just been abandoned during a desperate attempt by some French pianist to escape with it from the firefight? Really… What the hell was that piano doing in the middle of the street? Then I realized that such peculiar piano placement should neither bewilder nor amaze me, for I have personally seen equivalent ridiculousness within many estates.
Ugly People and Pie
Sometimes in my adventures I am privy to a situation where someone has passed away and the surviving relatives encircle the estate of the deceased like ravenous buzzards. Right away, sister fights sister, brother battles brother, cousin assaults cousin. Each tries to outsmart the others to get the biggest piece of the pie, or indeed, escape with the whole thing, pan and all.
Recent Comments